hmmm

hmmm,
I wish to feel myself as ordinary as others are
I get those thoughts that push me(my egos) to believe that
I am an uncommon soul,
whereas when i look inside i think what is it that i dislike in others,
or what is it that im trying to differentiate from others,
Why do i need to find a different identity , a special one for myself,
when i know everything is going to get down to ashes, how so ever special, different
or greater in comparision my image or identity is going to be.
and why do i want to be different than others.
my egos of becoming special are making me feel crazy at this moment.
At this moment, cos its only for this moment,
i know the inner desire in me is to become desireless and let my being understand the amount of functioning required by my mind. My wish to become greater sprouts from my mind and my mind has nothing to do with my spiritual soul,
my mind is related with my body. the temporary gift from nature, which has given me the charge to take over to use my gift.
I am a property of the nature, or its also true I am nature.
Well I am a drop of ocean and when i meet ocean i dissolve and disappear
And I am still water now when I am a drop
i.e I am still nature when I have my identity in the body or even when ill be without.
well without the body i ll have no identity... so when ultimately i would become without identity, why should i crave for identity and specialty and difference now!

Nature wants me to be back to the one/ or the zero again!